I do notice I have to take a few more breaks than usual.
I had a very nice birthday, lots of best wishes from family and friends and the day was so enjoyable. I still wonder if it's all in my head and still take comfort in what I see outside my window.
August storm clouds. It never rained one drop after watching this display.
I see some beautiful sunsets on my side of the building.
Not long after my birthday I saw these clouds. They seemed to be so low, I thought it might not take much to reach up and touch them.
A little "contrasty" but still just beautiful. My pictures just don't do justice to what I saw.
My racing heart never caused pain. Not once. Another reason to believe it was my panic attacks. It is now the end of August. I am watching a movie on my computer and it's almost time for bed. I take the last sip of my soft drink. I feel something pull in my throat but pay little attention to it until I'm getting ready for bed. It seems to be worse but I think it will go away by morning.
I get up around one a.m. and the pain hasn't gone. It's worse and now, the left side of my neck hurts as does the muscle area on my chest. Thinking it might be heart related, I get up the nerve to call an ambulance.
I spend most of the day in emergency. They have taken blood, done x-rays and monitored me through out the day. They want to keep me over night.
Obviously my heart was fine during this time because the next day, the doctor decides that it is some sort of strain. (I tried to tell them this from the beginning) I'm released and go home.
I spent the week trying to stay occupied. My heart continued it's racing and I simply didn't want to think about it any longer. By the weekend though, I'm back in the hospital. I called the ambulance again and I was so frightened. The pain was so bad this time. So bad it literally hurt to talk.
The squad who came to get me this time may have been the same as last time. The so called "captain" was less than sympathetic and would ask me questions barely giving me time to answer and becoming frustrated (that he was there?) tossed something that bounced off the buffet onto the floor.
They settled me into the ambulance and while they were plugging me into their monitors, I made a comment about the man in charge. I didn't know he was sitting behind me at the time. Once I was "plugged in" we were ready to leave. "Captain" makes a comment from behind me "I'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot" or some idiotic statement like that. I made no response.
Once again, I was in the hospital over night. This time, the highly trained emergency room doctors decided I had "a little bit of pneumonia" in the left lung and a "small rib fracture" on the right.
Really? Okay, I went home with antibiotics and even more frightened. I made an appointment to see my regular doctor that week.
I forgot to add the photos below. I took these September fourth, after my first trip to the hospital.
I love teapots and had this one sitting on my buffet when a friend from downstairs came to visit.
She brought these beautiful sunflowers.
Don't they look perfect in my teapot?
My appointment with my Dr., Dr. Perez was on September 13, 2012. This time, my heart not only scared me, it scared the nurse who was doing my vitals. My doctor came in, took a look at the EKG and said that the nurse was calling an ambulance. They had Becky come in at that point too, as she was the one who took me to my appointment.
I was in emergency again. This time was much different than the last two times. I just didn't know it. The last thing I remember was the emergency room nurse (who wasn't very nice to begin with) prepping me for a catheter. I had never had to have a catheter in my entire life so I was ignorant of how it was done. Oh, I had an idea of what it entailed but I wasn't prepared for it and before I knew it she was between my legs. I must have tried to stop her because I realized I was being held down.
I don't remember anything after that.
Well, I do remember the dreams --- and the pain.
No comments:
Post a Comment